I Chose This

Oh.My.Word.

Life is beyond kicking my butt right now. I'm exhausted, my head hurts, I've got a cold and my family and house are paying the price.

My house is suffering. Our house looks like a tornado blew through it. I'm afraid it's a permanent change. The exhaustion of returning to work, nursing a sick babe and being 16 weeks pregnant is more than I can bear. I can't seem to find the energy to start a load of laundry or sweep up the pet hair tumbleweed.

My marriage is suffering. You know how when you watch reality TV it's easy to choose whose side you're on? Friends, if my life were a reality TV show, you would be siding with my husband. Seriously, he's a saint and I've been far from it. (Not that he hasn't had his moments!)

My body is suffering. I knew returning to work meant returning to a sea of unwashed hands, fingers in mouths and contaminated surfaces. My first week and I scored a cold and passed it on to Connor. Poor kid.

The good news is that Connor does not seem to be suffering. He's very happy when Jesse brings him home and the change in his schedule hasn't seemed to phase him. PRAISE GOD!

I must remind myself daily, I chose this. I picked going back to work. I wanted to see if staying at home was really for me. I wanted to experience both worlds.

I like the stay at home mom world much better. We'll see if I'm singing the same song once (if) I get into the swing of things.